I'm not sure how this works...but I do believe that God gave me to my husband but he also made him for ME. I used to beg God to get me out of this. I was angry with God for putting me with someone who wasn't at all like me. He is calm, steady, simple, quiet and non emotional. I am passionate, crazy, emotional, a risk taker, talkative and a people person and very complicated. He doest care much about business or have a passion for it. He doesn't open up well with people and I share my testimony upon shaking hands sometimes ;) but what I used to CURSE God for, now I get on my knees and thank him for. I don't know if I would be able to do anything I do without his nature. He makes me laugh like no one can and he takes few things in life seriously. We are literally the opposite people in all ways and that used to make me sad and feel like I was missing out. ..now I feel like its what makes all this work. I used to depend on him for wholeness and all joy and completeness. And God made me stay and have him become all those things instead of my husband and now it works. Now its our biggest weapon. Now it's our greatest joy.
I just wanted to share that I woke up today with NO pain in my body and tons of energy and hope and peace! And I want to tell you that the other night while I was taking a bath I started to command off demons (spirit of infirmity and spirit of fear) and then confessed 3 healing scriptures over myself. Then I went into complete submission by stating the Lords prayer in my own way over and over believing that Gods will is for me to be healthy and whole lacking nothing full of peace and joy on earth as it is in heaven. I have had you all praying for me and my husband and children laying hands on me. My eyes have also been opened to many different lies that I have been believing my whole life. Now I see why Satan wants me to stay sick. Because now I see a whole bunch of lies that we all have been believing and all I want to do is share Jesus, the truth, with all the people. Amen.
So...I have been trying to avoid this but my prayer has always been of surrender and growth so it appears that I have an extreme blow of Chronic Fatigue Syndrome since we have moved here but it has got significantly worse this past week. I have suffered with it since being a teenager along with many other chronic illnesses. So here's the deal. God has been talking with me about demons and his word and healing and frankly I don't know what he wants to show me or how but this is exciting. I will walk through it again if it will help me help others heal! For the record, I have an appt to make sure its not something else but since I am aware :* of these debilitating symptoms, I'm pretty sure that's what it is. So while I believe in good medicine and essential oils and clean food , I do all that already and I have been known to put all my faith in those gospels in the past. So this time I am going to focus here. In this gospel. I believe Paul when he tells us that we aren't battling things we can see so the only answer is to first seek the wisdom of God and the Holy Spirit and use the power of the blood of Jesus applied to my body and claim his healing for my own. I have read enough testimonies about demons trembling and running in fear and this is my prayer for all. Surrender into a relationship with Jesus and healing and redemption. I am CONVINCED Satan is threatened by believers who are bold and thus cuts to their very weakness. Makes believers feel weak and powerless and confused . I know what my weakness is...I wont speak it out loud anymore...I am more than a conqueror and wont be bullied into sitting the bench on these last days...
For the record, this guy met me and I was a cute, blond, intoxicated , life of the party and then shortly after moving across the country to shack up in our crappy apartment I became very ill. I spent 2 years in bed. Sick and depressed. He went to work and paid for most everything and STAYED. We fought we hated each other but he stayed. I used to hate his light hearted humorous approach to everything, he really takes nothing seriously. I don't get much sympathy from him but NOW this has become my greatest gift. I thought the more I focused on my pain and sickness the better we would all be but he NEVER LETS ME. HE always makes me laugh and takes the focus off of it and that used to make me think he didn't care. But now I know its because he does. I tend to sit and comfort people in their pain and be empathetic and sympathetic and that's not him. And I can see now how in marriage if we were both people who could sit in pain and feel deeply...we probably wouldn't ever get out of bed, ever. ;) Marriage is sanctifying illness is sanctifying and I'm ready to be healed and share the good news!